The Final Hours

I don't know if you noticed the little countdown over there------>

I, personally, had nightmares last night of clocks and counters and gigantic exploding brains.

Only 4 hours left.

And then you won't have to hear me complain about chemistry anymore this year.

It'll start again in 2010.

Ah..that joke never gets old.

Dear Chemistry Final,

Dear Chemistry Final,

You are all that is left.

All that stands between me and the grade I really want in this class.

You. Me.

Bring it.

With blood, sweat & tears,
The 30something premed

Border line crazy

There, I said it. This is nuts.

Who on earth told me that I could do this?

Home school 4 children, take care of a grandpa AND go back to school?


I must be border-line crazy.

Or all out crazy.

The good news is....I only have 1 week to go in the semester. At this time next week I will be cramming chemistry down my throat like it was a deep dish Chicago-style pizza.

Only less tasty.

In the meantime, I gave my biology presentation and turned in a paper for that today.

I have a chemistry EXAM tomorrow.

A biology EXAM the next day (not to mention two separate doc appts that I get to take people to).

And a Chem final next Wednesday.

And that's it. Not too bad, really.

Then Christmas. Oh yeah! Forgot about that! Shopping? Decorating? Baking?

Wait. I did bake with the boys today.

Turns out chocolate is good for the brain.

And...that I like crazy.

Just wait until I tell you what classes I'm taking NEXT semester!

Dear Biology Professor

Dear Biology Professor,

You are now my favorite professor in the entire world. Not having to take the final because of my current 'A' is the best Christmas present ever.

I shall now remove the countdown widget.

With utmost respect,
The 30something premed

Proud Pre-Med Mama Moment

Today while speaking with my chemistry prof, my 4 year old made me one proud Mama.

Here's the tale:

Wednesday, whilst shadowing a doc, I asked about the differences in "new breeds" of medication. He answered and I had no idea what he said. He sort of sounded like the teacher on Charlie Brown. I mean, I caught a few of the words but...not enough.

So I asked my Chem prof today.

He whipped out his models and was showing me the differences in left handed and right handed isomers and really, I understood what he meant.

Apparently, so did my 4 year old.

He said, "Hey those colors match!"

To which CP (chem prof) responded, "That's right, there's blue, green and white..."

4yo: "Wait, White is NOT a color."

CP: "um, what did he just say?"

Yup, I'm raising a little army of nerds. And I am PROUD of it.

Meet Ed

Ed and I have been hanging out lately.

Yes. He is a toy, "a child's play thing" so to speak but, we're bonding, Ed & I. And his lovely flash cards that accompany him.

He's taught me so many things, like the 4 parts of the colon and that surgery might not be the best area of medicine for me to pursue.

You know, because most people don't want their livers dropped on the floor*.

So, Ed and I have been chillin'. Learning a bit about each other and prepping for that lovely A & P class and that test which shall not be named that is quickly approaching.

*Ed survived the trauma, although I think he might be in shock. He hasn't spoken a word since.

Memorable Monday

"When things get really small, they start acting really strange." -chem prof.

(not sure if he was taking about atoms or my children....)

Time is running out.

I added a couple of countdowns to my blog page. It is almost time for finals!

UNBELIEVABLE!

Semester #1 is almost over.

13 months until the MCATS.

But that's a whole 'nother countdown that I am NOT ready to begin.

First.

Chemistry.

When I Grow Up....

I just finished my paper for biology.

It was all about what I want to do when I grow up.

If only I hadn't asked myself this question a hundred thousand times in the last 5 minutes, then maybe it would have been easier to write.

Or something like that.

And really, it's not like I have to commit to whatever I wrote down on that paper...it's just that writing it down makes it all seem so much more real.

Not that the hours upon hours of homework aren't making it that real, you know....

Saturday (clever title, eh?)

It's Saturday.

Aren't you supposed to get to sleep until noon on Saturday?

Yeah, but not me. Today I will be:

1. Writing TWO separate reports
2. Taking ONE practice test
3. Taking TWO online quizzes
4. Redoing ONE biology exam for extra credit
5. Making a menu for a family of 7 to last until December
6. Cleaning the house of 7 people for the first time since September. (JUST kidding...sort of)
7. Grading my 5th graders math from last week
8. Making next week's lesson plans
9. Smacking myself on the head repeatedly while chanting "what was I thinking? what was I thinking? what was I thinking?"

So, go out and enjoy your Saturday and pity me. I will gladly accept it.

I made my bed...now if only I could lie in it!

...what was I thinking....

Dear fellow pre-med students,

My good friend gave me this shirt to wear at school today:
I hope you aren't easily offended by the truth!

Warmest regards,
The 30something premed.

Tonight I miss teaching

Ever have one of those moments when you think to your self, "Self, what in the world are you doing?"

And then you respond to yourself "Well, Self, I have no earthly CLUE what I am doing...."

Yeah, I had one of those moments tonight.

Well, I have those moments OFTEN. Tonight's was just more prolific.

I miss teaching. I do. I really enjoyed the classroom. I love the interaction with the students. I even, gasp, loved the grading and the lesson plans and the teacher's meetings.

So, what the heck am I doing in pre-med?

We had a colloquium at school (isn't that a fun word?) this evening and we heard 3 science teachers talk about how great their jobs are, trying to convince us that education is a great career choice. I found myself nodding my head so hard that it now currently hurts.

And then, in lab this evening, I (SHOCKER) actually understood the calculations and was able to teach them to a few other groups and it just made my heart ache for the classroom.

Granted, I'm not sure which I am more excited about...the understanding or the teaching...

However, for tonight, I just miss teaching.

Another Reason...

What this girl does every day is another reason why I am going into medicine...grab kleenex and go read.

The Difference

I am trying to figure out what the difference is between my chemistry and biology courses. I mean, there are obvious differences, like content and such. There are just some underlying oddities that make me go hmmm....

(which then makes me want to break into some C & C Music Factory songs...but I digress).

Here is one example: last week I had a kickin' Chemistry exam. I literally spent 24 hours (I counted) studying for that exam and still did not do as well as I hoped. Little bit of crying was done. For sure. I am a girl with real emotions, after all.

I have a biology exam in 15 minutes that I am not even remotely panicked over. I've spent a few hours this week preparing but NOTHING like I did for chemistry. I fully expect to do well.

Example 2: I have a solid A in bio. Chemistry? Not so much.

Example 3: The students in bio are not as well-behaved as the students in chemistry. It is really not fair to my bio prof. because she is really good and really smart and really makes things interesting. Maybe it is because my chem prof. blows things up in class and the students are afraid that they could be next. Just a thought...

Example 4: I am really looking forward to the next level of biology classes (genetics this spring!) and am really dreading organic chemistry and physics (fall 2010), for that matter.

So, what's the deal? What's the difference? I don't know and I guess it really doesn't matter.

I still have to take them. Means to an end and all that.

Ah, deep thoughts.

Better go take my exam now.

Man.

Well, stink.

I literally spent over 24 (non-consecutive) hours studying for my latest Chem exam and I still only got a c.

Stink.

I'm seriously considering plan B.

But the thirtysomething pre-nursing program just doesn't have the same ring.

Chem Exam, take 3

I won't lie to ya. Chemistry is kicking my rear.

Don't get me wrong....I love the concepts of Chemistry. I could listen to the lectures and watch labs run all day.

Well, not ALL day, but you get the idea.

AND, you'll notice I said WATCH labs run.

I just don't want to have to do it myself.

And if I never have to answer a stoichiometry problem again, it will be too soon.

Except for the fact that I will be answering at least 20 of them (well, not JUST stoichiometry) today.

I've only gotten C's on my last two exams and that really bugs me.

My wise and glorious mother reminded me of this fact, though:

"What do they call Dr.'s who got C's in Chemistry?"

"Doctor".

Dear "studly",

Dear "studly" football player,

Yes, they had cars when I went to school the first time.

Seriously. Wear your helmet next time you play.


With warmest wishes,

The thirtysomething pre-med

Absent

I do apologize for being absent for so long.

I was conducting my own hands-on extra credit project.

Also known as a cholecystectomy.

In normal people speak: I had my gall bladder taken out.

It hit hard. It hit fast. And knocked me out for almost 2 weeks.

I have pictures but as for the extra credit? No one really went for it...and the nurses wouldn't let me keep my gallbladder. Big meanies.

So, please excuse my absences.

Genetic Mutations

E asked me if I could somehow figure out a way to mutate his genes so he can have super powers.

This is as close as I could get. I'm only in my first semester, you know....

Monday Musings

"You know it's going to be a good one because we have to pull out our blast shield"

-Chem Prof shortly before igniting a Ski can with thermite...

LOVE IT!

Dear fellow pre-med student,

Dear fellow pre-med student,

I notice that you apparently get a kick out of making fun of my age...you know, even with a brain that graduated a few years ago, I'm still pretty perceptive. So, today, when you told me to ask the Prof. to start passing the tests out on our side of the room because I needed more time because I was way older? I sort of got the dig...wait, what was I talking about? I forgot. Oh no! Dimentia is setting in!

Better go buy my wrinkle cream and get out my hearing aides,

The 30 something pre-med

White Coat

I totally realized after I wrote that title that you probably think that the white coats were after me and that's why I haven't blogged in a few days....or not.

But last night, I felt like a real scientist.

Or maybe, like a real doctor.

I got to wear a white coat in lab and I totally flashed forward 3 years (or more) to when I get to wear a white coat all the time and people will call me, uh, Doctor.

I got a little creeped out.

And while we are on the subject, why is it that most docs don't wear those white coats anymore? None of the physicians I know wear them. I see them in nice attire or scrubs.

So, maybe I was a bit of a dork to get all excited. Plus, the coat said neurology on it. And I SO don't want to be a neurologist.

OH, but what if it said psych ward on it? Now that could be a sign....

Dear Gen Bio class,

Dear Gen Bio class,

I don't know if you realized this or not but, our professor actually knows way more than you about the subject of biology. I know, hard to believe, right? But, if you would just be quiet long enough to hear her speak, you might actually learn something. Just sayin'.

With warmest regards,

The 30something premed

Countdown

I am officially 5 weeks into school now. I wish I could tell you that it has been five LONG weeks, but...not so much. These weeks have flown by. Only 10 weeks left in the semester and only, I don't know, 7 years until I graduate med school?

If my countdown is correct, which, you know, it won't be, but still....

My oldest will graduate from high school the same year I graduate from Med school.

My 2nd will be getting his driver's license.

My 3rd will be a brand new teenager.

My 4th will be in his last year of elementary school.

And I...I will be ____ years old!!!! (I'm thirtysomething, remember???)

What have I done? Lord, what have I done???

The Dog Ate My Homework

or...the kid painted on my lab report...think it'll work?

Memorable Moments

"There's a saying in Chemistry that goes, "when you make hydrogen gas, you must blow it up."
-My Chemistry Professor

Now, that's my kind of class!

Dear boy sititng behind me...

Dear boy sitting behind me in Chemistry review class tonight,

I don't care if you know all the answers to the practice test and really don't need to be here to study, you still chew your gum louder than any person on the planet. Figure out that equation.

With warmest regards,
The 30something premed.

Hands-on Experience

My son fractured his elbow today. Loads of fun, really

But here is what I took away from my experience. Call me emotional or whatever. Call it hospital lunacy. Driven mad by hours in waiting room syndrome. Or something. But.....

So far, I haven't gotten a lot of support from the people around me on this whole "going back to school" thing. I usually get told that I'm crazy or asked how I am going to handle doing everything. There have been some eye-rolls, too.

Sad. I know.

But when we were at the orthopedics today (who ROCKED by the way...I may have found my new calling!), they asked if I was in medicine and I said, "well, not really, I just started my pre-med courses", they went crazy! I mean, took me out and explained to me, in detail, the x-rays and what each line meant and what each blob meant, asked me about my questions, told me how excited they were for me...I mean...over the top but STILL! It felt so good to be encouraged!

Now. This isn't to say that there are not people around me who DO encourage me, it's just they are a whole lot quieter than the not so encouraging people.

And, truthfully, I should probably have blogged more about my son's soccer injury but...well...he's in a cast for 2-6 weeks and that's about all there is to share, really.

My 2nd admissions email

I won't lie to ya, I already got an email from a prestigious school in the Midwest that pretty much scared the snot out of me and I can pretty much guarantee that unless I get a perfect score on the MCAT's I won't be attending...that and a full ride but...I digress.

......ahem.......

Here is my 2nd email from an admissions rep:

30-something premed,
Thank you for your interest in ________. Applying to medical school is a very competitive process in which there are no guarantees of acceptance. Although we have no specific pre-requisites we do recommend several courses to prepare you for the MCAT and for success in medical school. Those courses can be found at _______. A potential applicant should also be exploring his/her interest in medicine with some direct exposure to the field. This can be done through physician shadowing or through volunteering in a hospital or clinic. A good score on the MCAT is important, but it is only one part of a holistic review process that takes place for every applicant. Good luck!

I'm a little scared....

I had the WORST dream last night....

Oh man. It was a doozy.

I dreamt that I got a 0.0798 on my exam and was told to round it to the nearest significant figure and multiply it by 10 and that would be my score.

EIGHT PERCENT???

And then, it gets worse.

On the bottom of the page was a note from my Chemistry professor. It read:

"Chemistry is a difficult science that is changing everyday. Some people just aren't smart enough to handle it."

Are you kidding me?

I think I need to be more careful about what I choose to eat before bed time.

Just sayin'.

The First Exam

I am a Type A personality.

I like everything in it's place and I like things to go exactly the way I have planned them.

Just so you know...

I also don't like to get bad grades. Ever.

In fact, the first time I was in college I had to take golf and bowling....I got a C in those classes. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Totally ruined my GPA and to this day I despise both activities. Who gets a C in bowling. For. Real.

So, along comes our first Chemistry exam. No big deal...only it's a VERY big deal and I've spent a lot of time studying.

In fact, just last night, I was staring longingly at the clock wondering when would be considered TOO early to put the boys to bed. 5? 6?

What are the odds that I'm the only Pre-med major out there thinking those thoughts?

Cuz, let me just tell ya, I can't stay up all night studying anymore.

And, 4 boys don't allow you to study AT all, at least while they are awake.

6:30. 6:30 sounds like a reasonable bed time, don't ya think?

Kitchen Conversations

Me: (sitting at the kitchen table, reading my chemistry problem) I need to find how many grams of Cinnamic alcohol are contained in a sample mass of 0.469 g....

The Youngest: (happily playing with moonsand on the kitchen table, not missing a beat). Well, I think we only have one Graham in preschool but we have lots of girls!

Dear Couple in Love

Dear Couple in Love,

I know how you feel. I remember being that head over heels in love with my man way back in the day. The anxiety of being separated from him for an eternity (aka, 50 minute class).

However, if you must participate in a 10 minute lip-lock, please do not block the entrance to my classroom, thus forcing your fellow students to awkwardly sidle past you and the excessive amounts of drool puddling on the floor.

Thank you very much,

The 30something premed

When I Grow Up.

I guess I should tell you a little bit more about why I am even back in school.

I wanted to be a rock star when I grew up. Well, actually, that's not true.

At first I wanted to work at Sea World and train dolphins but I don't like the smell of fish and can't stand hot weather so, you know, that idea flopped.

Then I decided I wanted to be a rock star. So, I went to college with the noblest of intentions. Got my degree in education, just in case the whole rock star thing didn't work out for me. Which it didn't. Obviously.

I taught in the public school for a few years, worked at our local church for a few years and had babies for LOTS of years.

Thanks to those babies, I got to spend lots and LOTS of time in various doctor's offices, learning the in's and out's of fine parenting.

And what different rashes look like.

And how to avoid poison ivy.

And how to call poison control.

But that's a whole 'nother blog....

A long the way, we added my Grandpa to the crew and added ever more random medical knowledge to my brain...like chronic pulmonary obstructive disease

cardiac stints

AAA repairs (and no...it's not just a traveler's club!)

and on and on.

I started to think, hey, I could do this! I could be a doctor!

Maybe this is what I should be when I grow up....

Update on Class Politics

As the rather friendly girl that I am, I was chatting with Miss Future President today and told her I was once Class Pres, way back in the day.

She asked me how soon after polls closed I knew I had won.

She said, "Did they, like, email you?"

Me, "um, well, they didn't HAVE email back then...so they just called me."

......sigh......

Class Politics

I bet you didn't know this about me (and that should be no surprise since a lot of you DON'T know me at all) but, I was class president my first time around in college.

That's right. Me. Junior and Senior Year. The Pres.

Well, apparently it's that time of year at school. Time to run for student council!

Oh, the flashbacks. Think I should run again?

Just kidding.

Apparently they have rules about that...but I digress.

One young lady hopped up in front of Bio class today and declared her candidacy for Freshman Class President. She went on to give a rather lengthy speech about how she has great plans for the class and all the wonderful things she wants to do.

.....sigh.....the memories......

And then she said, "So, if you have any great ideas you would like to share with me, I'd love to hear them. And if I agree with them, then I might do something about it. Or I'll just do what I want."

Think I have a chance if I run against her?

Chem Lab....Ooops

So.

The first night of chem lab.

I'm afraid to admit this.

I hooked up the bunson burner to the water. Not the gas.

Yeah.

I did.

What just happened?

We just had our first group work project. I'm not so good at group work. I'm just not. I like to do things myself but, let me just tell you that I was SO grateful that a group of girls let me into their group. Phew!

The assignment was to answer a question and then write a brief paragraph discussing our answer. Pretty simple and I thought we did just fine.

Until I heard the first groups answer. YIKES!

Honestly, I thought they copied their answer out of Encylopedia Brittanica (if that still exists.).

And then we had to answer. I started with "Well, our answer isn't quite so flowery but here goes!"

Maybe it was the wrong thing to say....

After the class, I approached this other group and just asked where they got their information. I meant no harm. Really.

Her response. "From our brains."

(insert look of surprise on my face) "Oh"

"Yeah, see, WE just graduated from highschool last year, so all this biology vocabulary is still fresh in our minds. Maybe if YOU had just graduated, you could remember it to."

Ouch. What just happened there?

I about died laughing as I walked away and sat down to read my latest copy of AARP's monthly record...

First day Jitters

You know that feeling in high school when you walk into the cafeteria and you aren't sure where to sit because, well, you know that where you sit on that first day makes all the difference in your social standings?

It's not like that the 2nd time around in college. You just hope and pray you can still fit in to a desk designed for an 18 year old and that you can sit close enough to the board to be able to see without glasses.

And that no one will make fun of you.

I think I succeeded. I think.

I also realized that I just might be older than my biology prof. That was sad.

Attending class with "real" freshman is rather funny...and maybe annoying...and I would like to take this moment to apologize to any professors I had the first time around for being, shall we say, arrogant and "know-it-all-ish".

Case in point: Our Prof reminded us to buy our specialized lab book at the bookstore. It cost $55. Yes, that is a lot of money. And yes, the whining was IMMENSE!

"I already spent a ton of money on books?"
"Can we just borrow it from a friend?"
"Photocopy it?"

It took every ounce of strength I had not to stand up and yell out, "Dude! I just had to rearrange my GROCERY BILL to buy this book! Quit your crabbing!"

But I didn't.

Because 1. Saying "dude" would only prove my age.
and 2. Yelling about my grocery bill would only prove my age.

So I sat there and chuckled and waited for the whining to stop so the lecture could begin.

Ah....this is going to be interesting.

Wild Hare

I have this wild hare. I want to go to med school. And yet...I am old.

Not REALLY old...just 14 years older than the freshman who are in my general biology class and my Gen Chem class.

It's weird.

Weirder still? 4 of the students in my Gen Chem class were MY students when I taught junior high.

Just sayin'.

But I digress.

Hi. I am a thirtysomething pre-med student. Nice to meet you. I am raising 4 sons with the help of my ridiculously wonderful husband. We have a cat and a dog. I already have a degree in education but, you know, that just wasn't exciting enough so, I'm going back to school.

And yes, I've heard it before...I'm crazy.

Here's the deal. The stories I have from my first 2 weeks at school are just too much to hold in, so I have to blog. I HAVE to write them down. And laugh. And maybe, eventually, I might have to cry.

And I want to share them with you.